The Return of Man-Bear-Pig

The Return of Man-Bear-Pig is the fifth book of the Leftover Testament, covering the discovery of a new Man-Bear-Pig nest filled to the brim with nasty beasts.

Content
The Return of Man-Bear-Pig

1 1. The golf ball sailed over the hill and out of sight. "Hole in one!" RJ cheered, without knowing if it truly was. 2. He and the other members of the Anti-Man-Bear-Pig Defense Force, or AMBPDF for short, had decided to all go golfing to celebrate their recent victory over the vicious Man-Bear-Pig creatures. 3. RJ had apparently once again proven victorious in this golf session, as well. 4. As RJ climbed the steep hill in search of where his ball had landed, he came upon a familiar and dreadful sight. 5. "Oh no," he whispered worryingly to himself. 6. "Hey man, what's the holdup?" Matthias, a Marine, asked with an annoyed tone. 7. RJ raced back down the hill and told his allies what he had found. 8. If RJ was correct, then he had found a second Man-Bear-Pig nest. 9. "Let's go check it out!" the soldier named Kenneth exclaimed with a big goofy smile on his face. 10. "Are you crazy? It was hard enough to beat those things the first time!" RJ replied, incredulous. 11. "Well, we could go to gather intel and scout out the nest," Alberto said. "It may be deserted." 12. Everyone agreed with Alberto on this approach to the situation, and eagerly, yet cautiously, entered the nest. 13. Just as Alberto had suggested, the nest was completely vacant. 14. But as the Marine Lindsey was feeling along one wall in the darkness, she found a small crack in the rock. 15. "Find something?" Matthias asked. "Not yet," she replied. "But I think-" 16. She stopped abruptly as a large door opened from the cave wall, revealing a dimly-lit room with metal walls within.

2 1. The group decided to proceed into the room for inspection, and left Tyson and Kenneth as guards at the entrance. 2. "It's almost like a laboratory," Matthias observed as he passed a table covered with primitive-looking beakers and tools. "Or... a workshop." 3. "You'd better come see this," RJ called from behind a large cabinet. 4. He had raised his golf club into a defensive stance as he backed away from a large tube containing a frozen Man-Bear-Pig. 5. "This is the Park War all over again," Matthias muttered to himself wearily. He heard a sudden, distorted moan behind him. "Aw, hell." 6. An angry, awakened Man-Bear-Pig that had broken free of its tube threw itself at Matthias, who was forced to beat it down with his golf club. 7. "Berto!" Matthias called, and Alberto unlimbered his Paintball Grenade Launcher, which he always carried with him now, just in case. 8. He shot at more of the creatures as they spilled into the lab out of a conjoining hallway. 9. "Go, go, go!" RJ shouted, and the soldiers began to retreat from the lab and out of the cave.

3 1. "What happened?" Kenneth asked as everyone came running out of the room. 2. His answer came as a Man-Bear-Pig jumped out of the entrance and straight at Kenneth. 3. RJ was able to club it from behind, and Kenneth and Tyson joined the others as they hurried to leave. 4. When they arrived back out on the hill, they saw wave after wave of Man-Bear-Pigs approaching from the woods at the outskirts of the golf course. The war had clearly not ended. 5. RJ and Matthias tried reaching High Command on their comlinks, hoping to call in reinforcements. 6. "This is Team Mike Foxtrot, can anyone read me? I repeat, Team Mike Foxtrot, over," RJ asked into the comm urgently. 7. He soon received a reply from a familiar voice, one that he remembered from the last time he had been at Headquarters. 8. It was Connex Treshford, one of the officers from High Command. 9. "RJ, what on earth are you doing down there?" the officer asked, with fear and amazement in his voice. "I'm tracking movement all over the place!" 10. RJ looked on as a Man-Bear-Pig Chieftain approached, weapon drawn. "Sir, I'm finishing this fight."

Sixth Installment
The Man-Bear-Pigs Strike Back

Previous Installment
The Spawn of Man-Bear-Pig